More 55
I'm in a Mood. So I've been on a little roll.
She could see the dagger piercing his heart. Her hand soft yet firm on the handle, the way he never let her be with him, the steel sliding in smoothly as a penis, pricking his skin effortlessly, blood oozing like cherry cordial out of dark chocolate. He stood up; she turned over and sobbed silently.
I attempted a poem in 55 words as well.
Your name
on my cellphone
no longer looks
the same. The liquid
letters tremble as they rise
glowing in front of
my eyes, permutating
into unrecognizable contours, no longer carrying
the shivering warmth of anticipation.
It has become a stranger.
I debate deleting it,
but decide to wait.
Life is long enough to satisfy curiosity.
How does one distinguish between a good poem that doesn't rhyme and a bad one? I wonder if there's a rule about creating line breaks? Anyone care to elaborate?
posted by Princess Joya | 11:05 am
3 Comments:
its a relief that a good poem doesn't always have to rhyme. i am SO bad at potery. I write essays and press 'enter' and regular intervals to get lines out of it.
i cannot write a good poem to save my life.
That's kinda what i did with this one... except that i didn't feel i could do the regular interval bit because i wasn't following a specific meter. But that takes so much more effort... figuring out syllable numbers and line lengths and achieving a rhythm and cadence. Ive written sonnets before... but was seriously inspired back then!
come to think of it, the way the poem is center-aligned, makes it look like a diya! (in subconscious honour of diwali? teehee!) I had wanted it to look like a pot with a firm base.
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