Celebrating Woman or Relegating Her?
There was a time I used to love forwards like these, but now, strangely, they disturb me.
One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made woman, He was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,"but I have also made her tough.You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied,"Not only will she be able to think,she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something,and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord.You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,but they hold happiness,love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kisscan heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
PLEASE pass this along to all your women friends and relatives to remind them just how amazing they are.
Please excuse me while I try to sort my thoughts out - I just feel skeptical about this but cannot articulate exactly why. There was a time when I felt so proud to be a woman, to be this immensely strong, special person who could survive any wound and still have spirit enough to inspire and help others through their own pain - I have been the typical perfect girlfriend, dressing up, cooking, cleaning, pampering, cleaned baby shit and all that, doing random little things for friends and relatives and all that, being all goody-goody about traditions and stuff - till I started wondering, are emails like this and all this propaganda about how women are perfect and can do everything and are far stronger than men, superwomen managing both work and home and all that - simply subtle methods of reinforcing this stereotype and serving to subjugate women further in their gendered roles through manifestoes disguised as praise? Women are not born extra strong, the burdens they have to bear throughout their lives make them so. Sure, there's the myth about Eve's Original Sin and the fact that men and women are biologically different, but in my view, so much of the evolution of the sexes has to do with basic behaviour - what has been enforced and reinforced over the ages. We've forgotten what it is to be individuals, merely human beings, maybe like the Hermaphrodite that the Greek philosophers belived all humans are without being women or men. Who defined that men were supposed to do one thing and women another? Is there anything women cannot do that men can? Men can't childbear or breastfeed. Yes, a woman does feel a certain sense of responsibility for her offspring, if not her home, but is that natural or conditioned? Have we evolved emotionally just like those finches on the Galapagos islands did?
What do men have over women? Power. Physical and mental. The power to rape. The power to mindfuck. The power to screw multiple women and have multiple babies at the same time while women would take 9 months to bear. It is probably brute physical force that has kept women in check. While it is pointless to ask why the seeming unfairness, giving one sex physical strength naturally, and the other, mental strength (evolutionarily), the faact remains, it exists. And it shouldn't be a man's world simply because it is, now that we've been developing our reasoning for centuries.
I guess what I'm saying is that while it does warm my heart to be appreciated for the efforts I make as a woman for people, doing the little things that make life special that I dont have to do (though more often than not I'm taken for granted and those touches are only remembered accusatorily when they are no longer present), shouldn't all these things be human traits? Why do people think a man is liberal when he lets his wife work, but still expects her to do the housework and look after the kids? How many men do you know (and this may be culturally specific, but it may not), actually help more than nominally? How many men make their hot air into living substance in the house? In the gujju play I saw over the weekend the tomboy wife said something to the effect of "that it is only a man who is impotent in public life that feels the need to establish his manhood like some misguided lion in the home". And I agree.
And it's not true that women are incredibly strong. It's a human instinct to survive, to battle against the odds, to do what it takes to live, unless the individual in question feels suicidal. Women just have to take more daily shit, and because they do it because they've been trained that they have to, its not given any importance. While women rave over a man who will lift one finger extra like it's a big deal. The Bhagwad Gita puts immense moral pressure on women by stating that the woman is the moral fibre of the family. But the point is, men form these moral norms and then pressurise women into following then while letting themselves off easy. That's frickin unfair.
And a lot of the time, we women are our own enemies. We reinforce these norms on our own sex through gossip and condemnation of fellow women who are bold enough to venture beyond the traditional realms, to assert their sexuality, to assert their masculine side. Most of us don't push ourselves to realise our full potential in non-traditional fields.
So the point is, all these things that are attributed to women, should become human norms. The eradication of double standards will create true equality irrespective of the roles that each sex actually fulfills.
Push the boundaries!
One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made woman, He was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,"but I have also made her tough.You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied,"Not only will she be able to think,she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something,and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord.You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,but they hold happiness,love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kisscan heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
PLEASE pass this along to all your women friends and relatives to remind them just how amazing they are.
Please excuse me while I try to sort my thoughts out - I just feel skeptical about this but cannot articulate exactly why. There was a time when I felt so proud to be a woman, to be this immensely strong, special person who could survive any wound and still have spirit enough to inspire and help others through their own pain - I have been the typical perfect girlfriend, dressing up, cooking, cleaning, pampering, cleaned baby shit and all that, doing random little things for friends and relatives and all that, being all goody-goody about traditions and stuff - till I started wondering, are emails like this and all this propaganda about how women are perfect and can do everything and are far stronger than men, superwomen managing both work and home and all that - simply subtle methods of reinforcing this stereotype and serving to subjugate women further in their gendered roles through manifestoes disguised as praise? Women are not born extra strong, the burdens they have to bear throughout their lives make them so. Sure, there's the myth about Eve's Original Sin and the fact that men and women are biologically different, but in my view, so much of the evolution of the sexes has to do with basic behaviour - what has been enforced and reinforced over the ages. We've forgotten what it is to be individuals, merely human beings, maybe like the Hermaphrodite that the Greek philosophers belived all humans are without being women or men. Who defined that men were supposed to do one thing and women another? Is there anything women cannot do that men can? Men can't childbear or breastfeed. Yes, a woman does feel a certain sense of responsibility for her offspring, if not her home, but is that natural or conditioned? Have we evolved emotionally just like those finches on the Galapagos islands did?
What do men have over women? Power. Physical and mental. The power to rape. The power to mindfuck. The power to screw multiple women and have multiple babies at the same time while women would take 9 months to bear. It is probably brute physical force that has kept women in check. While it is pointless to ask why the seeming unfairness, giving one sex physical strength naturally, and the other, mental strength (evolutionarily), the faact remains, it exists. And it shouldn't be a man's world simply because it is, now that we've been developing our reasoning for centuries.
I guess what I'm saying is that while it does warm my heart to be appreciated for the efforts I make as a woman for people, doing the little things that make life special that I dont have to do (though more often than not I'm taken for granted and those touches are only remembered accusatorily when they are no longer present), shouldn't all these things be human traits? Why do people think a man is liberal when he lets his wife work, but still expects her to do the housework and look after the kids? How many men do you know (and this may be culturally specific, but it may not), actually help more than nominally? How many men make their hot air into living substance in the house? In the gujju play I saw over the weekend the tomboy wife said something to the effect of "that it is only a man who is impotent in public life that feels the need to establish his manhood like some misguided lion in the home". And I agree.
And it's not true that women are incredibly strong. It's a human instinct to survive, to battle against the odds, to do what it takes to live, unless the individual in question feels suicidal. Women just have to take more daily shit, and because they do it because they've been trained that they have to, its not given any importance. While women rave over a man who will lift one finger extra like it's a big deal. The Bhagwad Gita puts immense moral pressure on women by stating that the woman is the moral fibre of the family. But the point is, men form these moral norms and then pressurise women into following then while letting themselves off easy. That's frickin unfair.
And a lot of the time, we women are our own enemies. We reinforce these norms on our own sex through gossip and condemnation of fellow women who are bold enough to venture beyond the traditional realms, to assert their sexuality, to assert their masculine side. Most of us don't push ourselves to realise our full potential in non-traditional fields.
So the point is, all these things that are attributed to women, should become human norms. The eradication of double standards will create true equality irrespective of the roles that each sex actually fulfills.
Push the boundaries!
posted by Princess Joya | 3:44 am
4 Comments:
I just finished a book where a female character contemplating suicide realizes she can't do it because women don't live for themselves. She has other people -- other women -- to support, emotionally and financially.
I wish I knew if it was conditioned or evolutionary of what combination of the two. I'm skeptical that it's one or the other...but I'll come out and say it. I'm not sure men are fully realized as human beings; I'm not even sure they're capable of it. They seem to me shallow, ravenous creatures driven by the satisfaction of their desires. Even the pursuit of truth for them is a journey to an end, a goal to be achieved, a prize to be won. The truth is not something to encounter so much as it is something to conquer, to possess.
But I digress. What I'm trying to say is that I'm inclined to believe that women are more selfless and tend to look beyond their own needs and desires, not because of biological requirements but because we're more highly evolved. If anything, men have manipulated and limited these tendencies to their advantage. Even if we were to give them the benefit of the doubt, and assume this manipulation occurred unconsciously, that just means is that they obeyed their drive for satisfaction with a complete disregard for anything outside themselves.
Ultimately, you're right. The boundary lines should be drawn based not on biology but spirit. There are human beings and there are subhumans.
Ramble ramble ramble. I'll ruminate at work, and write a better response.
I think it was Buddha (correct me if I'm wrong), who said that women are incapable of attaining Nirvana because they are too attached. That's almost unfair. Why is it that in most religions salvation can only be attained through detachment? It's easier for men to do because they tend to live for themselves. Societies expect a woman to be self-actualised only through living for others and sacrificing selflessly. Everytime I consider suicide hypothetically it becomes progressively harder and harder to consider as a plausible possibility because I find myself imbibing more of society's thought processses, wondering what people will say, how it will affect my family's reputation as well as their feelings. These should not be consideration. Buddha and Mahavira both deserted their families (fine they were princes and there were others to take care of them), but few women would have been able to. You certainly cannot fault women for lack of will. It takes a lot more will to stay with people who will hamper your self-development at every step.
I'm so honoured to have you read me!
Men are creatures of extremes. Just as you said, they see enlightenment as deriving from detachment, but women must be both attached and detached from the world. We live in paradox. They must be both attached to all the people for whom they are responsible and detached enough to be zen when everything they are supposed to manage gets out of hand.
I think the Tao te Ching is the religious text that comes closest to a good definition of the feminine principle: The Tao, which is a feminine force, pervades its surroundings and is shaped but not affected by them, if that makes any sense. Or affected but not shaped. It responds without attachment, like water taking the shape of the ravine in which it flows or the drinking vessel where it comes to rest. Once again, paradox -- men get to be one or the other, or they are only capable of being one or the other, but women must inhabit both ends of a spectrum simultaneously.
And don't be honored, silly. (When I'm remembered 100 years from now as some great thinker, maybe consider it. :-P) But not now. Of course I want to know what's on your mind!
Now that we have established the innate superiority of women (like there was a doubt, hehe!)... damn, your last comment makes me proud to be a woman. I guess I'm not all that fully realised yet, to be able to let things go rather then let them affect my essence. But like I've said in my wednesday's article, I need to discover my essence first.
Thinking about this issue makes me liken women to chameleons. I guess I'm worried about my own extinction given my present inflexibility.
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